Ill Break your face

Thu, 28 Jun 2007 06:57:52 GMT

I haven't put this thing to use in a long time. So here is goes:

I have never felt so incomplete in my life. I am so terrifed of getting
hurt even more, when in reality, I'm doing it all to myself. I could prevent
everything that's been happening. But I don't think. I need to set things straight in my life. I just feel so misused. But on the Bright side, I have befriended so many awesome people again that i used to be great friends with. It rules. I just regret so many things the past 6 months. I can't even make myself happy.

Dan earle

Tue, 27 Feb 2007 06:54:03 GMT

I miss Dan Earle more than anything.
That's all I need right now to make my
days decent. Wouldn't mind hearing you
call me a "Dyke" right now. Come home!

Trying to get my mind off the shitty stuff.

Tue, 16 Jan 2007 05:38:59 GMT

I didn't think i'd fall for it. But I did.
And it hurts like hell. =[

Mon, 08 Jan 2007 08:03:02 GMT

What you are saying, would actuallly be true, If it was only me complaining about those selected few friends i have problems with. But It's not only me. And i was only saying how i hate how people care so much about my life and not their own. Just leave the situation alone. What you just did, was what my entire post was about. So just cut it out. You made it known to the world that you dont like me. So just drop it. Everyone knows, this has gone on long enough.

watching derailed.

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 22:08:27 GMT

By talking to a good friend of mine, she made me realize, that a lot of the people (not all) that I hang out with are not worth my time anymore. And she is right. It's pathetic how most of my so called "friends" care so much about what I'm doing with my life and not about their own. And most of them are either 20 or close to it. Now i see why she just totally gave up on everyone. I don't blame her. No one needs friends like this. No one needs friends that will blame you for shit that you didnt do, that will make fun of you behind your back, write songs about you, or straight up be a dick you you in front of everyone for no apparent reason just because you feel like making everyone else laugh. It sucks that it took me this long to realize this. I'm done trying to be a good friend to these people. Most of you are all a waste of effort and time. I just can't wait for some of you to grow up a little and learn how to actually be a decent friend.

This weeks been hell for me.
Now, I gotta get over you tooo.

I wish dan earle didnt leave. =/

fuck you guys

Sat, 06 Jan 2007 04:32:35 GMT

Apperntly I have NO self-respect for myself because of something that happened on New years. It is understandable though. But least i know its never happening again, and I was just really dumb and drunk, which is no excuse but still, it was the biggest mistake of my life. SO EVERYONE WHO IS SAYING SHIT, just fucking drop it. Its over its done with. And stop getting your stories MIXED UP and shit, because a lot of the stuff thats been getting back to me is entirely not true. So before you go spread the word, ask me. Id be glad to tell you. And if not, fuck you. I know what I did was wrong, you dont need to fill me in. I know. I got it.

Mon, 01 Jan 2007 19:52:37 GMT

A New Year.
And I'm still not happy....

I need to learn how to move on.
It sucks.

I love you Dan Earle.
Thanks for being there for me buddy.

Sun, 24 Dec 2006 21:05:47 GMT

Cause tonight baby, I wanna get freaky with you.

HAHA

Wed, 20 Dec 2006 00:04:27 GMT

I'm feeling a lot better about things. Im not so upset all the time.
Which is good i guess. I'm really happy Justin, Earle, and EVERYONE
else is down from college. They are realll great guys. Now that they're
down, this winter break wont be so terrible. I just miss my old best
friend. Oh mannn. But hey, what am i gonnna do about it! =/ Im kinda
nervous to see how this winter break turns out. But we'll seeeeeee.

bluetoooth

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 11:20:05 GMT

I just found out I have a sleeping disorder. It's killing
my chances of doing good in school. I sleep in the day time
and I'm wide awake at night. Its 6:16 AM, and I still haven't
fallen asleep yet. My ride is coming to pick me up in 40 Minutes.
I really need to start doing better in school if I wanna get the
hell out of this State. Which I will. I need this disorder taken
care of soon. Plus i just keep thinking of too much shit that sucks.
=[

I miss you Rob.

Wed, 29 Nov 2006 23:56:59 GMT

For the past few days, i have been non-stop, extremely upset.
I haven't really left my room. I just don't enjoy going out
anymore. Things have changed so much and I hate it. I don't
go to Taco bell tuesday anymore, i don't even go to frisbee.
None of that is fun to me anymore. I just get treated unfairly
by people who are suppose to be my friends.

Not to mention the fact that i am scared to be alone. I don't enjoy NOT having
a boyfriend. I am so dependent on others to make me happy and it's the stupidest
thing ever. I just found out about something last night that I wished I'd never
have heard. It's obvious that when you and your boyfriend break up you
guys are going to move on. But it's not that easy for me. I still have the same
feelings that I had for him when we were together. And its terrible. And knowing that
the other person has 0% feelings for you and has already moved on and gone his own
way is the worst feeling in the world. Im just not happy. And I'm NOT looking
forward to winter break. At all. Because know I'm going to also be excluded from
a lot of things. But thats a whole nother' story.

=[

Sun, 26 Nov 2006 23:46:21 GMT

Hanging out with different people was good for me this weekend.
I really enjoyed both nights i stayed at Andys house. First
night was kinda upseting, but last night was really fun. I enjoy
all of those kids. Driving everyone around both days was fun too.
PARTY DUDE. 2k6. I miss it already.

Back to the fact that i hate florida more than anything, My mom
told me that she wants to move, and she wants to relocate.. TO, Boston because
her good friend lives there and she can get her a good job. I'd rather move to Rhode
island so im gonna beg her to move there. She is still unsure if she wants to move
or not. I really hope she makes up her mind soon. i wanna leave. I hope we do, but NOT
to Boston.

Tue, 21 Nov 2006 06:35:01 GMT

I Want to get out of my house, Davie and the state of Florida.
I hate it here now.

Wed, 15 Nov 2006 15:09:10 GMT

I was having an off day this morning. Until i came home from
school and talked to Mike Cotugno. He is really great to talk
to about things actually. Thank youuu.

Making potatoe skins then it's off to 3rd hour!

Tue, 14 Nov 2006 02:39:46 GMT

Sometimes i can seriously be so dumb and I don't understand myself.
There is something so incredibly great right in front of me, and
Im too fucking caught up in something else to go after it. I finally
find someone who actually treats me great, and I can think of nothing
else but the person i cared about the most in the past. Im so DUMB.
its ridiculous. I know it's only been a week but i hope, I get over this
But honestly, i know the way I am. And that, is not gonna happen. Because
I'm a stupid girl and I want what i cant have.

=[

sadddd

Wed, 08 Nov 2006 04:19:13 GMT

So, I got broken up with. Things havent been too great with me. It's
hard to deal with this again. I just went through this 7 months ago. I
didn't sign up for getting hurt again. I just wish it wasn't so sudden. And
extremely unexpected. I used to always feel like i needed to have a boyfriend.
But after this break up, i dont ever want to get close to someone again. I'm
scared. I can't do it. I won't do it. I thought he was real great. I was wrong,
about a guy. Once again.

Tue, 31 Oct 2006 18:13:40 GMT

Even though i was made fun of A LOT in orlando hahaha it was still amazing.
Fucking great weekend. Horror nights wasnt that scary but it was fun. and Stefans
party was tooo good. Way tooo gooood.

This weekend is gonna be amazing. Jonah comes home FRIDAY!!! and NFG saturday!

HAPPY HALLOWEEEEN!!!!
wooooooooooo!

Fri, 27 Oct 2006 04:31:12 GMT

ORLANDOOOOOOOOOO tomorrrow.
with Rob. Thats all i care about.

Wed, 25 Oct 2006 05:02:07 GMT

Seriously, Life cannot get any better.
I mean this weekend was so incredible. Between The Buried and Me and the MIsery signals show was.. WOW. Dude, it was such a sick
show. I was impressed with both of their sets. Then, the following day... Say anything, days away and piebald. Terrific show. Ive never freaked
out so much at a show. ever... I started playing world of warcraft again too. Ive almost leveled twice since i started playing so im pretty happy about
that. The graphics on my new lap top are so sick too.

Then, this weekend, Im going to HALLOWEEN HORROR NIGHTS. Im driving up with jacob, and im getting out of school on friday at 12:30 with gabby
and johnny and were going to islands of adventure right when we get to orlando and were gonna ride all the rides before it closes for HHN..then were meeting up
with everyone and going to universal for horror nights. Then im staying with either mike or sean. Not sure yet. And minus the bear is playing in orlando on saturday
night so ill be seeing them. Then there is jeffs halloween frat costume party.And then were coming home sunday. Lots of pictures will be taken. Pretty rad weekend if you ask me.

Then the next weekend.. Friday night Jonie (Jonah) comes home finally. I guess im kinda happy about that. I just have a huge feeling things are gonna be shitty
maybe not.. But who cares.... THEN saturday night, the show ive been waiting for. NEW FOUND GLORY. I heard all the songs they are gonna be playing and im
really happy with the slection they chose to play. I honestly cant wait to hear all the bands. yessss.

AND THEN AFTER THAT. i have no idea.

Oh yeah, im getting VENOMS. but im not getting like hoops or anything. Just small dimonds. Me and paola
are gonna go. so excited.

I want to go to prom this year with one of my friends too.!
And im really fucking happy its getting cold outside.

Thu, 21 Sep 2006 05:06:28 GMT

All im gonna say is, I need to find a way to be happier.

Tue, 19 Sep 2006 01:00:47 GMT

I miss Summer.
Tonight, was probably one of the worst nights ive had in a long time. Everything that i want just seems to not work out for me anymore. My parents decided to hate each other. They're trying to get me to take sides and i cant take it. Im only 15 almost 16 years old. I shouldn't have to deal with this. It's a lot worse than im making it out to be too. My 16th birthday is coming up in a week. And i am getting nothing. The only things i asked for was a plane ticket to boston and a car. And neither are happening for me anymore. I dont even think im having a party or anything . And Lately i have been missing my boyfriend a lot more. But i see no effort from him. It doesnt seem like he cares too much about seeing me or even talking to me. Maybe this long distance shit just isnt for me. I guess its just the fact that I like him way more than he likes me. I fucked up with my last relationship and im really trying with this one. But it just doesnt seem good enough. Im also losing a lot of my friends. Some of them i understand why they could be upset with me and im sorry for what ive done in the past and ill try and be a better friend, but some people have absolutely no reason to dislike me. They just choose to be assholes and dislike me because their friends have a problem with me. I always feel like i have to put on an act because everyone sees me as being really energetic and happy all of the time. But im just not. Everything is different. Everything changed. I feel like nothing is working out for me. And i dont see things becoming better. Tonight was just a really lame night.

Fri, 15 Sep 2006 03:33:39 GMT

Im going to BOSTON with ROB to see JONAH!!!
September 28th - October 2nd.

You better believe it.
I havent been this happy in a looong time.

tireddd

Mon, 11 Sep 2006 04:13:52 GMT

Seriously, I was thinking, i feel like such an asshole for ever making fun of kids who enjoy drinking and smoking. I mean for everyone who i have ever put down. I am really sorry. I mean you know if you want to do it then it is your choice. Because honestly, now that I'm getting older i understand that people want to experiment with it and it is not a bad thing. I just feel like such a hypocrit now for ever putting people down who enjoy Drinking and Smoking. But don't get me wrong, i still have full respect for anyone who chooses to be straight edge. I think that is great. But im sorry for anyone that i ever put down in the past.

Seriously, The next 2 months are going to be insane.

-This Providence, and Hit the lights.
-Set Your Goals
-My Birthday
-Westerns Homecoming with Jacob
-Cypress Bays Homecoming with Rob
-Say Anything, Piebald and Days Away.
- Minus the Bear in Orlando and Halloween Horror Nights.
-New Found Glory, Cartel, Ht the lights, Early November
-Starting Line and the Format
-This Providence and the Hush Sound

and Hopefully ill get to go to Boston to see Jonah.

Fri, 01 Sep 2006 00:28:19 GMT

For a little bit i thought it was gonna work out.
But now, i'm having second thoughts.

Bye

Sat, 26 Aug 2006 06:16:25 GMT

Well, Jonah is Gone. Well, he is leaving tomorrow morning. So Tonight was my last
night with him. I wasn't happy the way it turned out at all. But it's funny because i'm
not surprised. I talked to Rob about it and he makes so much sense and made me
feel 10x better. It's going to be really hard with him gone. Most things will not be the
same anymore. But i think i'll be fine. I spent one great summer with him and I'm
hoping we are still together when he comes down again. But until then, I'll just be
with all my friends and hope for the best. =//